Arthritis, Muscle Pain, Nerve Pain – My New Normal

Pain is nothing.

It is in your mind and you are able to control it.

Two things you never tell someone with chronic pain. Also two things I believed previously and thought I could prove it, pregnancy & childbirth. Two things I now no longer believe except in the situation of pregnancy & childbirth.

Keep in mind, I meditate daily and do feel that meditation  helps. There is however no cure all for chronic pain. Chronic pain and acute pain are very different and needed to be treated differently also. One thing I will never do is judge a person on how they treat their pain, what works for you might not work for me and vice versa. However, none of us are doctors (unless you are) so we should not be promoting any type of  treatment at all, unless you are. Aaaaand even if you are, unless you are MY doctor, however helpful you think you are being, its rude. So please do not link pyramid scam “cure-all’s” down below.

Last weekend, I flew back home to shoot a friend’s wedding. This was probably the best prepared I have been for a trip. I was ready. I set a doctors appointment a few days before, to make sure I had all of my medications, including pain meds (flying as peaceful as it it is , it is also painful). I had a few things to pack in my carry on and toiletry bag, but with my alarm set at 5:30am and a depart time of 10:20am I thought, I should be just fine! So I pineappled my hair (let me know if you do not know what this is!?!) and I went to bed.

I never sleep well before a trip. I tossed and turned. A little bit of nerves but also excitement. You know that feeling you get the night before Christmas, a bit like that.  I felt so much better about this trip, no more stressing. Cutting out negativity like its nothing.

Then, I woke up, and it was sunlight. Alarm didn’t go off. It was 7am. I hopped in the shower, enlisted the houses help in getting my bags ready and got my make up base done, set up my uber and I was out.  I was in line at security by 9:02am, not bad.

Shit, my departure is 10:02 not 10:20.

My back started to grind and knees began to shake, I reach to open my purse, when I realized my pain pills were still on my mantel. I alerted an agent and she was able to arrange me a wheel chair and assistance to and from the terminal.

I literally rolled up to my girl, Stacey at baggage in a fucking wheel chair. I was not going to over do it before the wedding. That is for fucking sure.

I think I survived this weekend on nothing but mere adrenaline, I had a blast though.

I have Lupus, anklyosing spondylitis, Fibromyalgia and I am badass. I mean I experience bone pain, a fusion on my hip and a fusion in my shoulder, organ pain, muscle pain/spasms but I dare a mother fucker to tell me I cannot do something. I’m also pretty young, with a baby face – some say pretty and I mean I wouldn’t argue with them. So, it can be difficult to get help.

This trip was no different, as I exited the plane in St. Louis sure enough my wheel chair was not there and it took an argument to get the wheelchair I actually very much needed. I don’t know why people find it necessary to make a scene,  because someone needs assistance. What is it your business anyway?

Same problem on the way back.


I came home Monday,  it is Friday and I am still recovering. If this trip taught me one thing it would be that I need to slow it down. I am definitely learning. Today I am struggling with my hip pain and arms. My arms feel stiff and heavy.  I have no grip, it’s hard to type. What works for you all?


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